Word of the Day: GRACE!

Have you ever had one of those days where everything went just right? Yeah, me neither and the likelihood of that actually happening after becoming a parent becomes even more daunting, it seems. The likelihood when your child is autistic? (I suppose this is the part to insert a line of those emoji faces that are laughing with tears streaming down the face.) I imagine autism parenting is far different than being the parent of a 'typical' child but I have no doubt that many of the things are very much the same. I worry about my kid making friends at school, we have good days and we have struggles, and he makes me deliriously happy.


Today was a day of struggles. We were very out of routine.

Let me first interject that we are not one of those families that have our lives scheduled down to the minute...or even fifteen minutes. Oh, who am I kidding? Some days it's hard to even get pants on! We are on time to appointments, work, school etc. but we've never been those predictable schedule people who plan to the infinite detail. This is for several reasons. One, that is not who we are as people. Both my husband's and my personalities don't really lend themselves to a strict structure. We're pretty relaxed and Two, it seems like a bit of a disservice to our son to act as if the world will bend to what is convenient or comfortable for us. We don't upset the apple cart just for the fun of it but if we get to church on the weekend at 10:55 instead of 10:50 (or even go to the Saturday night service) it's not a big deal.

We do have consistency in that we normally go to school/work 5 days a week, and whoever picks up from school, is armed with fruit snacks and a piece of gum. Also, my husband and I pick him up together from daycare after school. HOWEVER, we are also not those people that are naive and shocked when something is different and our son reacts poorly to it. So, back to our day.

Here's a list of things that probably contributed to our Monday morning meltdown:
1) Four day weekend
2) Mom was gone Friday evening, Saturday evening and Sunday morning
3) New face! The school bus aide is different.
4) Bus driver announces he has a new assigned seat.

Okay, here we go: screaming child (check), new seat located by metal panel so kicks can seem devastatingly brutal (check), mini bus full of adults so all mom can do is give disapproving look through window (check). Did I forget anything? Oh yeah! The bus driver's look of wonder and she
shakes her head commenting, he's not usually like this.

 

SERIOUSLY!?! (breath) (opens mouth) (nope! breath again)  

Grace! Every part of me wanted to yell at her, "because he's autistic, you dope!" Instead I showed grace. Later, the person I have pick up my son to transport him to daycare came to my office. She was on crutches and this was just the latest of reasons she couldn't pick him up. I wanted to yell, but I didn't. I showed grace. I picked my son up from school, and when I went to drop him off at daycare for a couple of hours, I was told that my loving, amazing, responsible, nurturing provider is retiring.  And then, I failed to show grace. I cried and when I got in my car, I yelled about how life wasn't fair and people are stupid.

Grace is extending kindness to the unworthy. No matter your circumstances, somebody you speak to this week is going to need shown some grace. Someone in the parking lot or on the road is going to need shown grace. Someone online or on social media is probably going to need shown some grace. This week, show some grace to someone who needs it!!

For judgment is without mercy to one who has shown no mercy. Mercy triumphs over judgment. James 2:13 (ESV)